LIBBY's profileLibby Dawn AbrahamPhotosBlogListsMore Tools Help

Blog


    4/13/2007

    5 years ago next month

    5 years ago next month I graduated from High School, That night my best friend told my hubby that I liked him and told me that she had slipped and said something to him as he was walking right up to me to talk.  I wanted to crawl into the back seat and die, but I didn't and I am glad now for her opening her big mouth because we decided to start dating soon after that and by November of that year we were married.  I am so proud of that moment, that day when I got married.  I was ready to be married I knew I loved him and that he loved me.  We have faced enough in our lives like most couples do.  We have 2 beautiful children and a love that will last forever.  I am proud of him for being gone for so long 2 years of our marriage serving this country, and he was so great.  He has always been so good to me, he has never done anything to make me doubt his love for me and I am so glad for that.  I am proud of all that I have accomplished in 5 years it hasn't all been easy but it's been worth it, to be with someone like him I love that man.
    9/27/2006

    Loving & Living...

    Today has been a good day, Brock was home for half the day and it was great to have him help with the kids and all that good stuff.  I love him loving me.  He is such a great man.  I am so proud to be his wife.  Just recently he was wondering out loud about being stressed about money, and he asked me if I ever worried, I said no, that he is such a hard worker, that if there is no money coming in... it isn't his fault.  I think since then he hasn't worried as much. 
     
    Sadie and Carter are growing up so fast, just tonight when we were taking Brock to his truck, Sadie says to him, we need a newer bigger house.
     
    Brock asked her why, she responded, we need a new baby.  He told her Carter was a baby.   So she says to him, but we need a tiny baby and Carter isn't tiny is he.?
     
    She is too smart, and Carter is catching up too, he thinks he is so big he is saying the prayer now and can pronounce so many words for a two year old I am shocked he knows.
     
    They are both having a problem lately with repeating their dad's swear words.  Sadie has said S-H-I-T & D-A-M-N-E-T!!  Carter has only said S-H-I-T.  I wish he'd learn to watch his mouth.
     
    Well it's late and Sadie has preschool in the very early morning.
    8/29/2006

    Truckin'

    So today my baby boy, Carter, went on the truck with Brock. He was so excited to leave.  I feel so lonely with it being just Sadie and I.  After we left them at Walkers ( a convience store down the road from where we live) we got home and I said to Sadie, " I can't believe Carter is going with daddy on the truck!!". 
     
    To which she responded by saying, " Oh mom, don't be sad, the boys will be home in a few days!"
     
    I think I about laughed my butt off.  I am not kidding you, she has started acting like she's thirteen instead of three.  I am finding it more difficult to be a mom, she wants to do everything all by herself, despite how late we are she thinks she needs to do her self up in her carseat, which takes atleast 10 times longer than it takes for me to do it.  She also has started tattling and talking back, also lying is her thing right now, so we wonder what to do with her somedays.  I know she has an imagination but she lies about stuff that is serious like she came in the other day and told me that Carter had bit her, and he was napping.  I just told her to knock it off and to leave him alone.  Kids ya gotta love em!!!
     
    So Brock is doing good with his whole peterbilt thing and I am attemping at going through things for our house to get it ready to sell so that next year we can buy or build.  We have a perfect house plan picked out, but I don't think we'll build unless prices stay the same.  I am excited to have a yard, to have my own flower garden will be so much fun!!!  Also we need alot more space than we have and I can't wait.
     
    Well goodnight all, I think I am going to Provo tomarrow with Tori, my aunt, and her two little girls Emma and Eron.  Sadie and I will have so much fun!!!
    8/11/2006

    Everything's still going good

    Everything is still going good, Brock got his truck (a 2007 379X Peterbilt)  and it is way good looking, I will add some pictures next time of it.  We also took the kids to the Hogle Zoo, they loved it, will add those pictures next time too.  Brock and I went to Faith Hill and Tim McGrawn on the 5th of this month, it was nice to stay in a nice hotel with my hubby and just do fun adult things with no kids hanging on us.  I love my kids alot, but I needed the break.  We are planning on going with him for a few trips before September, because after that Sadie starts pre-school and she is sooo excited one of her little friends Jesse is going to be in her class.  Jesse is My mother in laws boss' granddaughter and Sadie and her play together.  I am attempting potty training Carter now since he is asking to use the potty and goes by himself half the time.  I know if we had a bigger house and our health insurance figured out for when Brock gets out we might be adding on, but we have talked about it and decided that next year we should be back on our feet finacially enough to get a bigger house or to build so that we can then start talking about when to add on to our family but until then NO WE ARE NOT PREGNANT NOR PLAN ON BEING FOR A WHILE so don't ask.
     
    I am trying to get to sleep and am finally wiped out enough to hit the sheets so happy snoozing to me goodnight!!!
    7/13/2006

    so far so good!!

    I have been a little busy this past week, I had to have a HIDA scan (for my gallbladder) and an ultra sound on my gall bladder.  It seems my gallbladder is working okay so they prescribed me some medicine for IBS (irritable bowel syndrome) and sent me on my way.  So far so good!! 
     
    Brock has been off and on working for his step-grandpa and my dad, today he is taking my dad's truck to Bakersfield CA.  I miss him so much when he is gone, but he is starting to get stir crazy and needs something to do besides sit at home and wait for his truck to get here.
     
    I did laundry all day yesterday and still have more to do.  I don't mind the washing and drying it's the folding and putting away that I hate.  Oh well it has to be done.
     
    Last night we had Taco's with vegtables fresh out of Brock's parents garden.  um YUMMY!!!  Speaking of which, Carter has discovered the  art of pea picking and he loves them, he can't just walk by, he bends over and picks a few an d heads back so that someone will help him eat them.  He calls them Candy peas.  It's too cute.
     
    It's his birthday on the 19th and so on Saturday Mitzi and I are going up north to do some shopping.  WITHOUT KIDS!!!  Brock is watching them and we get a break!!  I am so excited!!
     
    Well better go!!
    7/4/2006

    Sorry it has been so long...

    Sorry it has been so long, Brock got home on June 22nd and it has been great.  I can't describe the feeling you get when you see that plane overhead and know that he is on it, safe and free!!  I cried and have cried a lot the past few weeks.  Love it.  Don't know how I ever lived without him.
     
    Today was not so great.  We were supposed to ride in the parade, and we slept in until it was like 25 minutes till the parade started.  Not exactly good timing...  Also Brock told me off about talking about someone that was wearing a not so good outfit for someone their weight and I stormed off to sit in the car, 3 blocks away, until the parade was almost over.
     
    Today I am really trying to be in a good mood, but it's hard when it's cold and rainy, not exactly my kind of day.
     
    Brock goes back to work this week.  He is taking his step-grandpa's truck for the rest of the week and he found a different truck that he is going to look at at Peterbilt in Denver, CO while he is over there tomarrow.  I am glad he's decided against waiting till after August 1st.  We can't afford any more time off, too many bills.  Oh well guess that's what lifes about making and spending money. 
     
    I hope that I don't wait as long as the last time to write more. 
    6/17/2006

    Why not me...

    Okay, I am so darn excited.  Today was just great, Service and Charlie Battery got to Cedar today, and meanwhile my hubby is on a 2 day pass down in Pensacola Florida.  He and six other guys rented a van and drove down there.  I wish that they would just process them through (demobilize them) and get them home.  I watched the news tonight and it made me cry, cause I want it to be me. 
     
    I am happy my hubby is safe and sound, but he probably won't be here till atleast thursday.  Now haven't we waited long enough!!  I am so excited, but I won't be at ease till my house is clean, laundry is done and I am on my way down to Cedar to pick his butt up.  They still aren't for sure what date it will be exactly, which has me upset, but hey we are almost done with this completely and I am so psyched to get my arms around him.
     
    Today was Brock's dad's birthday and we had a barbaque!! Hamburgers, potato salad, deviled eggs, watermelon, cantelope and grapes, baked beans, rice and strawberry salad, and cucumber punch!! The cucumber punch is just limeade, cucumbers and a few liters of sprite.  It is surprizingly good.  I had to rub it into Brock on exactly everything he was missing out on!! 
     
    I guess it's father's day tomarrow and I don't think I'll go to church, I am really exhausted and I need to work more on my house since I can ever get anyone to watch my kids for me during the day, I will be cleaning it tomarrow morning and then finishing up tomarrow night with the Laundry.  I wish I could hire someone to do this crap for me, but no such luck!!
     
    I wish I was in Florida with Brock, why does he get to have fun and I have to clean the house!!
    6/13/2006

    My busy day...

    My busy day started out with me sleeping in, then calling to schedule my tanning appointments for the rest of the week since Brock probably won't be home till next week.  I wish we knew more, but all I know is that Brock is somewhere between Kuwait and Camp Shelby, Mississippi.  I miss that man and can't wait to kiss him and hold his hand.  I just want to look in his eyes for the first time in almost 6 months. 
     
    I am so proud of him.  He was awarded 2 Army Acheievement Medals and the Combat Action Medal (I don't know the exact name of it)  I am so happy that he was rewarded for his great attitude.  I guess one of his awards was for uparmoring (adding armor) the vehicle they drove from Kuwait to Ramadi in, all on his own, he wanted to make sure his gunner was safe, and so he did it on his own time.  It was also mentioned on the other award that he maintained the Hummer on his own time always making sure that it was ready to go on time, and that everything was in exact working order.  Both officers that nominated him for both awards mentioned on them that he had a "Can do and will do attitude"  It is so nice to read that others think that he is as great of a man as I do.  He was awarded the Combat one, for a time when an I.E.D. (improvised explosive device) went off as they were driving.  Thank Heaven's that no one was hurt.  He never mentioned these awards to me, because "they weren't a big deal" he said.  I recieved them in a package he sent me.  I am just so proud of him.
     
    He should be calling me soon, probably early morning to let me know he is back on American Soil.  I will then break out in to the song GOD BLESS AMERICA  I am so happy this whole deployment is over and we can start living our life.  I love my family and can't wait to get my hands on the man I love!!
    6/12/2006

    More Information on Brock

    UMMMMM..... is there anyone in the world who is more excited than me???  Brock will soon be home here are some tenative dates.
     
    He is still in Kuwait, much to my dismay, but he should be leaving there on the 13th.  So I guess that is in a few days.  I am literally restraining myself from jumping up and down.
     
    He should be in Camp Shelby, Mississippi for 5 days (this may or may not change) putting him home around the 20th.
     
    I didn't think this would ever come and wonder why it feels like this part is the worst, even though he was just in HOSTILE territory.  I am going insane waiting for him to be in my arms!!  Atleast he is safe in sound.
     
    Here is an email that he wrote me today, he cracks me up!!
     
    hey babe haw are doing. i am fine only 2 more days in Kuwait. i cannot wait.
    less than 2 weeks and we will be reunited. any way i don't have much time on
    the internet. so i want to let you know i will probably not call you
    tonight, becuase i have only 12 min. on my phone card. i will call you
    tomarrow night means it will be my last night in Kuwait. well got to go... 
    Love you tons

    love your fat huspand
    now isn't he funny, he thinks he's fatter since getting to Kuwait.  Ha ha.  I love this man, he literally can make me smile just thinking of him!! I asked him if he was going to be drinking beer to celebrate his new found freedom, he told me no, but I don't know if I believe it.  He uh can't leave the base once they get to Shelby, so I am not to worried!!  plus, he hasn't been big on drinking since before we got married.  I am glad too, I don't like the get drunk and all that kind of stuff. 
     
    So I am getting my hair touched up tomarrow and will be tanning everyday this week as to be as tan as possible when he gets here!!  I also have a surprize for him, but since he reads this it won't be mentioned on here because then it wouldn't be a surprize.
     
    Oh and if you are wondering why I am up so late??  Carter has insisted on sleeping in my bed without me and I can't get in there or he kicks me on the head, so have to wait to go to bed.
     
    Kids, can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em.
    6/9/2006

    What the future looks like from here....

    Okay, I have taken it upon myself to think about how my life is going to change when Brock gets home, and what the ups and downs of this deployment have been, and also what I have learned and how it has changed me.  So here goes, humor me if it doesn't make perfect sense it's my life and how I see things...
     
    My life is going to change alot, Brock will soon be home and I will have to relinquish my hogging the bed all to myself.  I wish that was all that was going to change, but it's not.  Soon I will be seeing alot of the mad I married almost 4 years ago.  I will be attempting to hand over alot of control back to him, not only dealing with finances, but with parenting and lots of other things that I have had to be the main decision maker for the past year and a half.  Another thing that will change is money, Brock is an over-the-road truck owner/operator and his truck makes around twice the amount we are making now, but that doesn't mean that I'll get to spend it, we have to save, save, save.  Not only for the truck, but for other expenses such as health insurance, truck equipment, taxes, a new house, and vacations we are wanting to go on as a family. 
     
    I know that we are going to have our moments with our marriage and adjusting to him returning from a war zone.  We are expecting to have disagreements and for it to be difficult for all of us, our poor kids will not only have me breathing down their necks to be good, but now their dad that has been gone for far too long to have too much patience with them will be added into the mix.  I only hope that it will be as smooth as possible.
     
    I am so greatful for all that has happened the past 18 months, I have learned alot, mainly that if I had to do it without him I could, but that in no way would I ever choose to be a single mom.  I have also learned that I love my husband more than I ever knew was possible.  He has been so awesome about everything and we both have matured alot more than I expected.  I have also learned that the military way of life isn't for us, It is so hard for him to be away and he just isn't all that into staying in, he has a hard time running and passing PT and he has a hard time with some of the way they run things.  I have learned alot about my husband that I know I wouldn't have learned any other way.  I have learned that he loves his country and willing to fulfill his duties.  He may not have enjoyed, but he did it and I am so proud of him.
     
    This has changed me, I have experienced things that I know I never would have, I have become good friends with my mother in law, I have learned to love her so much, and I have learned that family can always be depended on, when help is needed, and our families are very loving, forgiving and supportive,  I have learned to love my dad probably more than I ever thought possible, more than once he has said things to others and to myself, and I have learned through that what kind of man he really is,  He supported me and helped with my kids, he has tried extra hard with his patience with my kids and helped more than he had to, and I am so greatful for his love and support, and Priesthood Blessings he gave Brock and I whenever we asked for them.  My mom has been very helpful and supportive, she has watched my kids during the day so I could get my house clean, go to the dr. or the dentist or the hair salon.  And she has been a great support and my thanks to my parents and my brothers and sisters wil probably never equal to how much help they have given us.  Brock's family has also been AWESOME They have helped so much more than they probably ever will know, I have learned to love them as if they were my own family, and have learned that they are willing to do alot of things for me, above and beyond what they have been asked. 
     
    Our families are really in truth jumping up and down because his coming home, means that they no longer are going to be expecte to help with our kids.  I hope they know how much Brock and I love and appreciate them all.
     
    I also have learned that there are some ladies, that have saved me from some of my darkest hours, by giving advice, challenges, and love and support.  I am so proud to have gotten to know all the ladies of 222 YAHOO GROUP (even if I have only met a few in person)  They have been so helpful and I love and appreciate all of them.
     
    Now I would like to say that I have been having a bad day, my mom and I talked earlier today, and she told me my grandpa, her dad, was diagnosed with prostate cancer yesterday.  I am upset to say the least and hope that the specialists and oncologists will know more and will have some good news. 
     
    I have good news, so I hope all of you have actually read all of this or you'll miss out... Brock is safe and sound in KUWAIT!!  He will leave for the U.S. on the 13th and should be in Camp Shelby for 5 days after they get there, and then its' SWEET HOME UTAH!!!  I am so excited!!  Thanks for bearing with me, and reading all this.  I am off to bed, finally!!!
     
     
    6/6/2006

    sitting still....

    Have you ever just sat up in the middle of the night, and couldn't get to sleep.  I keep waking up at odd hours and can't get back to sleep.  I usually stay up till after 11 p.m. because that is around the time Brock usually calls.  Tonight my phone rang and it was him, we were talking about something and all of a sudden the phone call was lost and I don't know if I made him upset or if they turned of the phone, but now I am worried that Brock is mad at me and hope that he will call me back pretty soon. 
     
    Time is going by so slow that it seems like I am sitting still and that it seems like It's going to be forever till I see him again.  I am nervous, anxious, excited and happy for him to come home.  I don't know what to expect and I am cringing and worried sick that I may say or do something to make him wish he was still back in Iraq.  I hope that it doesn' t happen, but I am just so nervous, I am trying really hard to not expect much, but it's really hard, not knowing alot of things.
     
    I wish I could have been superwoman these past 18 months, I feel like I have really been stupid and haven't really don't anything great.  I have managed to screw up on alot of things, I hope Brock will forgive me for, nothing major, just things that I have or haven't done that could have made our lives lots easier.  I just hope we can work things out like adults and get on living our life together.
     
    I can't wait to get him in my arms and to hold him.
     
    By the way finally got Sadie and I's birthday cards from him!!  A little late, but better than never!!  I sure do love that man!!
     
     
    6/5/2006

    ALMOST BETTER

    I am almost all better!! I am now being bothered by a slight runny, but chafed nose!!  I am actually happy that it should be gone by the time Brock gets back.
     
    Tomarrow I get my sony camera back, 7.2 megapixels I have missed you!!  I love my camera, and it broke and I had to send it in to get it fixed.  I paid lots of money but it was totally worth it.  I am glad I will have my nice camera for when Brock gets home, since he didn't think I would get it fixed at all. 
     
    He told me when he thinks they are leaving and I am not excited about it all since they have to travel to the other place, then fly to Kuwait.   Still it is safer than his way he came into Iraq, the first vehicle in the convoy I think I about pulled my hair out that week.  I am glad he isn't doing that this time.  I am so glad that time has wound down, and that we have had these experiences, I am not saying that if I had to do it all over again that we would do it again... But I am proud to say that my husband went to war and served his country.  I am so proud of him and all his accomplishments, he was given some awards and was in the Richfield Reaper for one of them.  I was so happy to see his picture in the paper.  I think sometimes he thinks I don't care about stuff like that because I don't ask too many questions about what exactly they do, but I care alot and am very proud of him!!
    6/2/2006

    SICK...again!!

    Yes, we are all sick at the Abraham house, well except for Carter, lucky guy he'll get it later after I am better.  Or maybe he already had it.  Oh well.  I got sick a few days ago and Sadie got sick yesterday.  It isn't strep because the dr. did a strep test today, I hate those they make me gag till I almost puke, shoving a q-tip down my throat is not my idea of fun.  Inow am waiting, and soon am going to wal-mart to get some medication for Sadie to knock her out tonight, and keep her asleep hopefully so she'll sleep good.  I ran out of medicine the other day, not something you want to do when you're sick or your child is sick.
     
    Well anyways, soon my hubby may be on his way home, who knows when, just as long as he gets here soon!! I have missed that man for way too long, it's time for him to come and take care of his family!!  Oh I am so excited!!  I can't wait!!  2 1/2 weeks from now and he  should be safe in my arms, I hope!!
     
    Well this weekend we are going to try to take it easy, but we may not be able to do that as we are trying to do everything that we can to get ready for Brock being home!!  I can't decide wether to make signs or have them made for me!!  I really don't want the mess here at my house so I am thinking of just having them made.  I am going to have a sign made for each of my kids and myself.  I don't know what to put, but I am sure I'll figure it out.
     
    I better go, the kids are crying, in the tub!!  They are fighting.  (THE STORY OF MY LIFE)
    5/29/2006

    What a weekend

    What a weekend this has been, first Friday was my birthday and it sucked as usually since Brock was gone and everything.  But I did actually enjoy myself a little bit, I got some new clothes and jewelry and shoes, and stuff like that.  I was so glad to get my birthday over with, because I know now it's one day closer to Brock getting home.
     
    This past week or so my big sis Laura and her kiddies have been visiting from Tennesee, and it has been so much fun, she leaves on friday and I don't know how I am going to let her take her kids and leave us, but I will have to find a way.
     
    Also Brock called to inform me that he got his last package and it was missing some things that we supposed to be in it.  So I asked him what was missing his magazines that he wanted, and my friends hubbies prescription foot cream, and he asked me why I sent him so much snacks, well I hadn't. Also someone's Mike Tyson video and other Boxing videos were in it.  He was hoping they weren't his, and he was right I am glad he got it finally but, it was sure funny that it had been mixed up.
     
    Today we went to the cemetary to put flowers on my Dad's, Dad's grave and, my brother in law Mikes Dad's grave.  It was so nice to be able to take the time to think of them.  I never knew my grandpa, he died when my dad was younger and I miss him, and really wish I could have met him.   I know that I love him, and glad that someday I will get to meet him.  I have been thinking lately about all service members who have been killed in Action or have died as a result of the War, I was thinking of how sad it must be to die so far away from loved ones.  I know they are all going to Heaven, and they all deserve it.  They've fought hard, they'll get a great reward.  I also have been thinking of a kid that I went to school with that was killed my senior year in a car accident, he was in the guard and was such an awesome kid.  I can only hope that I will be able to remember how precious and fragile life is and live a full life so someone will remember me.
     
    I am tired and ready for bed. 
    5/25/2006

    Someone is spoiled!!

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY
    SADIE SHAE!!!
     
    So if you haven't guessed who is spoiled it's Sadie my 3 year old, yes I feel so sad, I remember the day I found out I was pregnant with her, and now she is three.  Wow, and guess what tomarrow is...
     
    Anyways, Sadie really is spoiled her is a list of what she got...
     
    princess bike, helmet and knee and elbow pads, also a shopping cart with groceries for her to push around our living room and den, and a princess tea set, lots of cute clothes, a doll and diaper bag, also a swing set (that stays at grandma's house) and a ballerina outfit with shoes, she also got lots of dress up clothes.  She sure is spoiled.
     
    Well I am not too excited for my day tomarrow, I wonder what I was thinking wishing this upon myself three years ago " JUST AS LONG AS SHE IS BORN BEFORE MY BIRTHDAY."  I said and sure enough the very day before mine I was in the delivery room pushing for 4 hours and then to have the c-section.  I was glad to get that birthday over with and I hope that I never am recovering from a c-section on my birthday again.
     
    I am off to bed a little early for me, but I am exhausted and my bed is calling my name!!
     
    5/21/2006

    busy, busy...

    So I am going to be a busy little woman for the next few weeks.  I am very happy, but would be happier if I could get some decent sleep.  It seems lately that I lay in bed and watch TV half the night.  It drives me crazy.  I am so tired this morning and I know I didn't get good sleep because I have a headache and I feel awful.  Hope It stops being like this when Brock gets home. 
     
    Well yesterday Carter had bad luck, first in Kmart he fell out of the cart, straight on his head (this has happened before), then after we got out of their we went to my aunt and uncles house and he fell out on the sidewalk, he forgot to put his hands out to catch his fall and really hit his head hard, then while I was trying to finish eating, I heard him screaming out in the garage, sure enough he had been playing on one of their scooters and it had fallen and hit him in the head, this time he got a bloody nose.  Not exactly the easiest day of my life, but knowing that Brock will be home soon sure helps alot.  I am sure surprized of how time has passed, it seems like it goes by as slow as possible, until you look at it from now, he has been gone for 17 months.  That is a long time, for sure.  I am so glad he will be home in less than a month, atleast he has been calling really good to help keep me calm.  He is the best hubby in the world.
    5/17/2006

    One Happy Girl

    I am one happy girl!!  Brock called me this morning and told me that He should be home about a week earilier give or take a few days than what was expected!!  WOHOOO!! I am so excited!!
     
    I have been super busy, I had a reunion workshop on wednesday, mother's day dinner, and on Sunday we went to church with Brock's Grandma Joann for mother's day it was a surprize, then after church was over we had a lunch at the park with a few of Brock's cousins and aunts and uncles.  It was so nice to see everyone and catch up on family things. 
     
    I had a teeth cleaning on Tuesday morning and the girl that cleans my teeth, actually told me she could tell that I had been flossing and brushing my teeth better since the last time (so all the hard work has been paying off)  I also had 6 more cavities and have to get a crown on one of my teeth, so the dentist said he wasn't comfortable with knowing that I was flossing and brushing and still getting lots of cavities and prescribed a toothpaste for me to use.  I also had my hair done, the girl added some more blonde extensions in and also some red chunks.  I had alot of comments today on them!!  I love my hair now!!  Also on Tuesday I ate dinner at Brock's mom house, she got pizza and it was yummy.
     
    Tomarrow my big sis Laura and her cute kids and new baby get in to Vegas around 10:30 p.m.  My mom and I are driving down to get them I am so excited to see my new nephew!!  and of course to see how big Justin and Brianna are getting. 
     
    Brock and I are both so excited for him to get home and finally get to be a family again, I am sick of all the missing him and finally want to be able to know he is home and safe will be great.
     
    I am off to put Sadie back in her bed, and then off to bed myself.  Goodnight all!!
    5/11/2006

    Undecided

    We are still undecided about the house, we know we are selling ours but we can't buy without selling the one we already own.  Plus, I know Brock would rather buy a house he's already seen then buy one and hate it after we have paid money for it.  I really like the house but know if it's meant to happen, it will and if not, then it's for the best.
     
    I am glad that we are to the stage where we are having meetings about them coming home.  Whew!!  Didn't know when it started if we'd make it this far... But we have improved and I can't believe how the time has went.  Soon he'll be home and it'll be better.  I know to expect some problems, I don't want to say it's going to be perfect because I know it won't.  I know we'll have to merge two different ways of life back together again, and it won't be easy.  I also know that we will have to keep communicating our feelings as well as we have been, mostly this is my problem, I am pretty good to hide it-- and then all of a sudden the Beast from the dark arises and I am saying things that I know aren't true and Wish that are never said.  I hope that we are better than before (we already are) and I know that if we can stay that way we will be okay.  I know it takes two people to make a marriage work and so hopefully with lots of blessings and everything we can get along, and hopefully in  a year from know be on our way to the Temple!! 
     
    I am proud of Brock for sure, he has been my rock that has made this whole thing worth it, he is always supportive of my decisions and is such a great husband and provider for our family.  He is just wonderful and I am so glad that I married him and had his babies!! He is the best guy in the world.  And guess what HE'S MINE!!!
     
     
    5/8/2006

    A new House.... maybe!

    So Brock and I have been talking about selling our house and what to do either build or buy a bigger one.  The only problem has been finding one in a good neighborhood, built within the past 15-20 years, that I would go for.  Well we found a house that is a great price and I am going to meet with one of the builders, since it is being built and won't be finished till end of June.  Let me tell ya about it..
     
    It is a 3 bedroom 2 1/2 bath house, it has a 2 car garage, a laundry room, living room, family room, kitchen and dinning room.  It also has an unfinished basement that consists of space for 2 bedrooms.  It is just down the road from where we live, so it is in the same ward that we are in now.  If we buy it we will get to pick the color of the stucco and the flooring, and countertops and all that good stuff.  Brock is really excited about it, which is kinda unlike him, and so am I.  I am going to go meet with the guy and his wife to touch base with him and talk about buying it.  I am so excited.
     
    Brock has been really awesome about calling us since he got back in January from his leave.  He calls everyother day usually, and sometimes more often than that.  WE are getting along really well and I am really anticipating a good reunion, when he gets home.  I know that we'll have arguments and stuff, but at the same time I know without a doubt that we will make it because we have learned to communicate better.  I am so proud of him and so happy that he'll be home soon.
    5/3/2006

    The past few days...

    The past few days have been interesting.  Monday morning Brock's mom called me upset, her mom's ex-husband had passed away, and wanted me to let Brock know somehow.  I waited till I knew the armory would be open and tried to get ahold of the Family Support Leader, eventually she picked up and she said she would email the commander.  I know that Brock was very close to this man and still calls him Grandpa.  My phone rang finally and it was Brock saying he'd just gotten off the phone with his mom, I was relieved that they had told him and that he had spoken with his mom.  We pretty much talked about the kids and my family's annoying little trip to lagoon they have planned that I do not want to go on, to much stress for my kids to ride around in a stroller all day long.  And Brock said that he wants to take go to the Zoo in July when we go to pick up his Peterbilt, so he said to wait to take them till he was home.  I wish that he was home now so I didn't have to stress over stupid things, but as it is, I am going to tell my mom no.  I really don't enjoy stuff like that, so I am going to have a serious talk with my mom about stuff.  I am going to be getting ready for Sadies birthday which I may have to go up shopping that weekend anyways if that is the only one that I am not busy on, so we'll have to wait and see.
     
    I haven't been feeling well today, I woke up with a sore throat and headache and was freezing, and my head was burning up.  I went and put a movie in for the kids and laid down for a while.  I have decided that I hate my life right now, but love the people that are in it.  Hopefully by the end of June, my life will be a major improvement.  I will be done with planning girls camp, and Brock will be home.  YIPPEE!!